Lisa

 

 

     I’ve been hurting for far too long in this marriage and having Curtis cater to me the way he did last night brought something out in me I’ve been missing in my marriage. He gave me back my raw animalistic passion. I wanted him, and I wanted him desperately. I already knew my behavior was inappropriate, didn’t need to hear it from someone else. Candy made it seem dirty because I took pleasure in another man’s company. No, I’m not calling her. I’ll give it a few days before approaching her. I scroll down to my mom’s number and hit the speed dial button.

    “Hello,” she bellows as if she’s deaf. Her voice makes my headache pound even harder.

    “Hi, Mom. It’s Lisa,” I announce as if she can’t recognize her own daughter’s voice. She doesn’t sound quite like herself this morning. Her coughs sound angrier. She has had this chest cold for almost a month now and has been in and out of the doctor’s office with the same result. They don’t know what’s wrong with her.

    “Hi, sweetheart. How’s my baby doing?”

    “I’m doing fine, Mom. How are? Your cough sounds like it’s gotten worse.”

   “Not good, sweetheart,” she says in a raspy voice. “This week has been hard on me. I went to the doctor on Monday and he told me I have high blood pressure. He prescribed some medicine for me to take, but it makes me sleepy. I haven’t been able to do anything all week.”

    “Why didn’t you call to tell me this?”

    Hearing about this now upsets me. Then I remember telling her not to call me for every little thing, and I could kick myself for my insensitivity. The woman carried me for nine months, the least I can do is be bothered by her.

    She sighs heavily. “I didn’t want to worry you unnecessarily anymore… you have a lot going on in your life right now and I didn’t want to add more to your plate.”

    “Mom, I’m sorry for what I said the other day. You can call me anytime. I was having a bad day and took it out on you. Can you forgive an insensitive daughter?”

    “It’s OK, baby. I know you didn’t mean any harm. I’m getting old, nothing to worry about. Nobody can stop the will of God when it’s their turn,” she says with resignation.

    Before I can say anything more, she changes the subject.

    “How is that handsome husband of yours doing? The last time I spoke to you, you told me he was cheating on you.

Accusation of infidelity is a serious charge, you know. Has he straightened out your suspicions?”

    She had to go there. My mom has a way of making me feel stupid and inadequate. We constantly butt heads when

John is the topic of discussion.

    “Straighten out my suspicions? Mom, I know he is cheating on me. Doesn’t that bother you?”

    “Lisa, honey you need to give it a rest. You don’t have any evidence the man is cheating on you. All you have are your suspicions, baby. I’m sure it’s that girlfriend of yours who John don’t want you hanging around that’s filling your head up with these lies about him. You ever wonder why she can’t keep a man around? It’s because she is her mother’s child.”

    “Who, Candy? She never badmouths John and this isn’t about Candy. This is about John and his doggish ways.”

    The grip I have on the phone tightens and rage fills my lungs. Chanting “she’s your mother” repeatedly in my head clears the rage rising to consume me.

    “You haven’t been able to prove that he’s doing anything wrong. Just let the man be a man,” my mom says.

    She tsks.